At any rate, I decided to reflect on tests and ventures that I can wrap my head around and leave coat hanger mysteries to someone with more expertise in the area of closet life. What I know is that every challenge taxes my physical strength and my capacity for facing the unknown. Inevitably, challenges present me with moments when I wonder if it is worth continuing through the stress. Quitting, or not even accepting the challenge in the first place, can be such a tempting alternative. Still, if I see it through to the end—whatever it is, there are always rewards. Even if no one else recognizes the benefits of my having completed the course, the satisfaction of following through is a reward in itself and there is no way to know where that experience will take me.
SoFoBoMo 2008 was such a test for me. The fact that I actually completed a project, then had the courage to post it online (rather than hiding it away and believing that I couldn’t find a way to get it online), was a triumph over doubts. And, that victory over myself has, in turn, led to more risk-taking with my photography.
Over and over in life, the lesson is there to be learned. One step (no matter how small) leads to the next, and that one to the next, and so on until, before long, we look back and see that we have traveled some distance, and that the journey has been filled with discoveries.
Having confronted my doubts in tackling SoFoBoMo last year opened up all sorts of doors for me. Since completing that project, I find that I listen to even more impulses to try new things. The doubts still nag, but their voices have been muted by the little successes along the way—and even by the failures. After all, once you fail, get up brush yourself off and discover that there are no permanent bruises, the next risk isn’t so daunting.
There is no doubt that I will complete my SoFoBoMo 2009 project—somehow, some way. No matter how woefully behind I am this year, I will get it done. After all, I wouldn’t want to miss any steps in my journey.
P.S. That mountain just peeking above the clouds is our Bear Mountain and on the other side of the mountain is home. A trip to Bakersfield last Tuesday gave us an opportunity to enjoy this view.